Roaming…

Like a cell phone signal far away from home. Always roaming. Not knowing quite where to land. Wishing that I had all the answers to all the questions. Never getting the solution to the problems my heart encounters. Seems like an endless plight. Will my heart always roam? Where is the real estate agent that will find my heart a home? Can’t earn commission off of that sale. Maybe that’s why I will continue to roam. Day after day,night after night, can’t seem to find my home. Hoping that when I lay down, I won’t wake up alone.

Smiles and laughter hide the inner tears. Cover girl can’t disguise these scars. For every time I encounter someone, they get deeper. Pretty soon, they’ll destroy the little bit of heart I have left. It’s ironic that what I need the most is destroying me the most. Never satisfied. Sometimes I want to curl up and go to sleep. Hoping and praying that when I arise, it will all be a bad dream. Damn near 32 years on this earth, and I’ve yet to accomplish my greatest wish, my most awesome desire, the thing that I’ve wanted more then anything. Never saw the knight in shining armor, never met the prince that gave me the kiss of life, never met the person I could be with happily ever after, never will I be rescued, never will I be saved, where is my redemption? Am I looking in the wrong direction? Some say be patient, but patience is dampening my spirit and burdening my heart.

Where is my shepherd, or must I continue to roam? Never quite settling down, and always alone.