Blah, Blah, Blah....

That's how I feel today. I have a headache and my sinuses are acting up, and to top it off, I'm tired as hell. I couldn't sleep last night. Don't know why. So today I'm feeling real blah and yucky. And the same stuff I've been ranting about for the past several months is still bothering me...So I guess ranting about it is not relieving the cloud of sadness that surrounds my heart from time to time...I don't have any explanation to what this blog is for. Some folks enjoy reading it, some don't. I guess it's just my way to vent. I grow tiresome of venting to friends, cause friends got too much to say... Sometimes you don't need advice, you just need a hug and somebody to listen... I can always count on my son for the hug, but he never listens...His attention span, well... He's 5,give him a break. And my pillow swallows all the tears, never wipes them away. I gotta do that. Yeah I'm a grown up, but sometimes I feel like a kid. I'm so confused and so hurt all the time, and there is no comfort for me... Just gotta hold it all in and pretend, it doesn't hurt.

Love is the happiest and the saddest emotion I know. It's so beautiful but yet it can be so ugly. When no one loves you, you feel like the world is going to end, and then when you're in love, some times you can't wait to fall out of love. It's a huge contradiction. I try to avoid it at all costs. But every now and then it gets to me. I'm impatient. And my mind gets so cloudy from time to time. Only way to get rid of that feeling is to sleep it off. My bed is calling me...My mind is confused and my heart is heavy...