A friend of mine bought a new car yesterday. No it wasn't brand new, but it was new for him. I was really happy for him because I knew all the trouble he was facing with his old car. He really deserved that new car. It made my day yesterday knowing that his days would be easier now. It's funny because he and I stopped speaking for a while. Nothing intentional, we just kind of lost touch. And yesterday he called me out the blue and let me know that he had finally bought a new car. I couldn't have been happier. Unless you do me grimy, I'm always going to be your friend. I have no reason not to be. I'm a good person and I believe in honesty and being a true friend. I can only hope and pray that others feel the same.

Yes I do get sad from time to time. No I'm not going to slit my wrists or drive off a bridge. I think we all get sad. And if you don't get sad, I think something is wrong with you. Sorry, just my personal opinion. Sadness is a very basic human emotion. It's something that we first experience as a child and never really quite know how to handle that emotion. How do I explain to my five year old son on how he should handle sadness. "Some Chick" told me to look towards the future because the sun will come out in the morning. And even though she used a metaphor, relating the sun to joy, she was quite right. See no matter how you feel, the sun always rises in the morning. No matter how upset you are, time always progresses. No matter who is born, or who dies, time never stays still. And if you're going to live in this big, bad world, you must realize that the only way to truly succeed is to make the most of that time. And yes we are all guilty of squandering time. Some days we waste our time doing nothing, and some days we waste it feeling sad and depressed. Some days we sleep away, and some days we do nothing proactive. Some days we are soooo lazy that we don't really leave our house and get out of bed. But personally, I never thought rest was a waste of time. It's a part of life. Like breathing and eating. And whenever, I feel sad, I get rest. It seems to repair my breaking heart and heavy mind. I'm blessed to find solitude in sleep. Some find it in bottles and pills, charge cards, casinos, or on the corner, me, I find it in rest. I went to bed early last night. And when I woke up, guess what? The sun was shining!

I'm feeling ugly today. Don't know why. Something is bothering me and I can't really put my finger on it. I'm just sad. I guess it's just one of those days. Or maybe it's just been one of those weeks. Reality is annoying me. I try to be a good person. Some days I don't know if I'm trying hard enough. Some days I think I'm trying too much.

And some times I feel like if all we have is all these years, then we really don't have anything at all. There's really nothing there. Just a facade of a relationship, or a friendship. And some times when you want something so bad, you don't want to realize that you're never going to get it. It's been a long 5 years. 5 whole years of disappointment, 5 whole years of loneliness, 5 whole years of having no one to depend on or rely on. There's no sense of complaining because the last 5 years are what's ahead of me too. Minute after minute, hour after hour, day after day, month after month, year after year. It's the same thing... Me myself and I...

I don't know how many times I have preached to be humble. For a long time I didn't know what that word meant. Humble. It wasn't until I pledged my sorority that I was made to understand that word. And ever since then I have been humble. Sometimes in life you gotta know when to shut up and let stuff happen. You can't always preach about what you know and what you've done in life. Sometimes folks don't want to hear all that. And telling your life experience to folks can come across as bragging. I often call myself a walking Trivial Pursuit game. I always blurt out little pieces of factual information. I'm working on it. It's just something I do. But it makes some folks feel uncomfortable. Sometimes I have to just shut up. It can come across as "know it all" behavior. I also answer other people's rhetorical questions. Bad habit. But I know it's something I need to work on.

Real Friends are hard to find. In fact, once you find one, hold on to that friend. Many of our enemies come in disguises as friends. I once heard that the biggest trick the devil played on the world was to convince the world he didn't exist. The devil is around us each and every day. And while I don't believe that people are the devil, I do believe that the devil can influence us to act like we don't know any better. That can explain why good people do bad things. It's just a theory. I have been blessed with good and bad events in my life. The bad are often trials. Trials that may take a spell to get through. Some call them storms. When a storm hits, all you can do is pray and hold on. Hold on to your virtues, your beliefs, and your faith. The storm will pass. GOD shows us everyday that change is evident. When you woke up this morning, you opened your eyes. When you went in to wake your child, he or she woke up. When you went to go feed the dog or cat, they came to you. When you brushed your teeth this morning, your mouth felt better. When you jumped in your car and headed to work, you got there. And if you had a fender-bender, you were able to make that call to your insurance agent. Some of us didn't have the luxury of waking up, or waking up our child, or feeding the dog, or brushing our teeth, or jumping in the car and heading for work. All the things that make up your daily routine, are all miracles. The fact that you woke up was a miracle. The sleeping child derived from a miracle. The fact that the dog came to you this morning was a miracle. Miracles are large and small. And sometimes they don't come when you think you need one. But that doesn't mean they don't exist.

And even though my heart breaks from time to time and some days I get a little sad, I try to remember all the miracles. All the things that GOD has given me and continues to give me. I'm constantly reminded that storms do pass and miracles do happen.